Confession time: I Get Lonely
A couple of months ago I found myself sitting in a cute
French-style café in downtown Richmond. The tea was great, however, what was
even better was the company. Here I was sitting across from a soon to be bride.
Even though she was tired from a full day of work, shopping, dress fittings,
and a last minute hair appointment she had that glow! You know the “I am so in
love my face hurts because I smile every time I think of him” glow! Her joy
brightened up that dimly lit café! After a few moments of girly giggles she
turned to me and said the most profound words:
“ As a single woman there were times when I felt lonely.
However, lonely times are just that times. Let God help you work through them
and move on. Don’t stay in those times”.
So what did I learn from this profound wisdom? Lesson one:
lonely moments are just moments. The cool thing about moments they come and go.
Everyone gets “moments”. The key is not to turn your moment into a season or
place where you dwell for a long stretch of time. God’s desire for us is to
live an abundant life. The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I
have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. John 10:10 Allowing yourself to feel lonely all the time is
not living life to the full. Notice how I said allowing yourself.
Lesson two: Everyone gets lonely married or single. If you think a knight in shining armor or a
blushing bride is the common cure for the lonely bug then be prepared to be royally
disappointed. Even Jesus felt a moment of
loneliness. Don’t believe me? Check out Mark 14:32-42.
Mark 14:32-42:
32 They went to a place called Gethsemane, and Jesus
said to his disciples, “Sit here while I pray.” 33 He took Peter, James and
John along with him, and he began to be deeply distressed and troubled. 34 “My
soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death,” he said to them. “Stay
here and keep watch.”
35 Going a little farther, he fell to the ground and
prayed that if possible the hour might pass from him. 36 “Abba,[a] Father,” he said, “everything is possible
for you. Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.”
37 Then he returned to his disciples and found them
sleeping. “Simon,” he said to Peter, “are you asleep? Couldn’t you keep watch
for one hour? 38 Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation.
The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.”
39 Once more he went away and prayed the same thing. 40 When
he came back, he again found them sleeping, because their eyes were heavy. They
did not know what to say to him.
41 Returning the third time, he said to them, “Are you
still sleeping and resting? Enough! The hour has come. Look, the Son of Man is
delivered into the hands of sinners. 42 Rise! Let us go! Here comes my
betrayer!”
Heavy reading right! All he wanted was someone to pray with
him the hour before he literally laid down his life and all these dudes could
do was sleep! Trust me, Jesus definitely understands lonely.
Okay so how do we turn those lonely moments upside down?
Here are some suggestions:
- Spend time with the Lord! Jesus did not stop praying just because he felt alone. In fact, he spent that time casting his worries and fears on his father. (hint, hint)
- Call a buddy and express how you feel! Not to complain but sometimes you just need to vent.
- Get out of the house. Sometimes we get lonely because we are bored. A trip to your favorite museum or bookstore might be just the pick me up you need.
- Do something for someone else. Volunteer, plan and host a party or a girl’s night out, offer to babysit for the single mom who needs a breather or call another single and offer to pray for them. I find that when I am struggling eight other single friends of mine are having the same struggle. Also, to be honest helping others always feels good!
- Be selfish. While this clearly contradicts number 4 I stand by it. Do something for you. Go get a massage, a manicure, take a trip to your favorite coffee shop, read your favorite book for the tenth time, or go on walk. Do whatever YOU want to do!
- Start a blog! My personal favorite suggestion!
If you have more suggestions add them to the comments
section. Let’s help each other out!
Wonderfully written lady and great advice for anyone one.
ReplyDeleteI am well acquainted with those lonely days and longing for that other half, but even in the longing I think it is imperative to live life and form who you are as a daughter of the King.